There has been quite a political debate over new legislation proposed at increasing funds for stem cell research. Most of the arguments are aimed at the processes revolving around in-vitro fertilization and the excess embryos created. New legislation would set things into motion to use these excess embryos for scientific research. Currently the debate is stuck in conference committee in the senate where Republican Committee Chairman Brent Clogin is proposing even newer concepts.

The Republican Senator from Nebraska is going in a direction that would change the entire outlook on stem cell research. In the study released by John Hopkins last October, it was reported that pre-basilica staged embryos have a high content of Certoginian. Certoginian is a protein that contains nomadic charges. Scientific jargon aside, basically the report says that embryos have fuel potential. Clogin announced these finding to the committee as well as examples from his own research center exhibiting the potential for embryos. “We have conclusive evidence that pr-basilica staged embryos have a high potential for energy use. In our early tests we demonstrated this potential by substituting three 2 nd staged embryos for AAA batteries in a Energizer Maglite. The results were astounding. As the internal spring penetrated the cell wall, energy was created. The light flickered for .0012438 *10^-16 seconds. This is a breakthrough of huge proportions.”

While the Senate is considering this new information, other research is coming out into public about the other uses of embryos. Chanel No 5, one of the most coveted perfumes on the market has been discovered to use embryos in its recipe. As well, Craft the multi billion dollar condiment maker, revealed it has been using embryo's in its food making processes.

We were able to talk to one of Craft's representatives on this topic.

Q: How are you using embryos in your production?

Craft: Well, despite rumors, we don't actually use embryos in our products. Because employee morale is low, we created a “happy mist” which is vented into our factories twice daily.

Q: What actually does this “happy mist” entail?

Craft: The mist itself is more of a steam created by boiling embryos in our delicious mayonnaise and ranch dressing.

Because of the nature of all of this new information on the use of embryos, the senate is calling a special session to finish this topic. Senator Clogin, despite recent acclaim is coming under investigation for violation of FDA laws which were set in motion last October.


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